“We find a place for what we lose. Although we know that after such a loss the acute stage of mourning will subside, we also know that we shall remain inconsolable and will never find a substitute. No matter what may fill the gap, even if it be filled completely, it nevertheless remains something else”.
~Sigmund Freud (1961)
“Goodbye, Grandad!”
The stages of grief…
Whether you are a religious or spiritual soul or not, once you have actually gotten through the work of mourning, you’ll look back on it all with wonder. Right now, you won’t understand this, but in retrospect, you’ll be forced to admit it is a miraculously designed process.
There is a good reason for each step or stage of the grief process.
Grief doesn’t actually follow a neat little progression of stages or cycles. It’s much messier than that. It’s a very complicated and personal thing.
There will be a lot of regression or backtracking to earlier “stages” or “tasks”. And that’s okay. It just means you weren’t yet finished, and are fully working it through in your own way.
You might like this book about moving through grief and finding your ways after a loss.
Important Points About the Stages of Grief
The stages of grief…
We give here a brief overview of the “grief stages” so you will understand better what is happening to you, and what to expect in the future. There are several “theories” about how grief works, and experts have proposed several working models. We present four of the most commonly utilized models below.
We suggest you read about them all, as they make for interesting reading, and each one adds a little bit more insight. But remember, these are just models: just scholars trying to get their minds around one of the most complicated emotional processes of the human experience.
And keep these points in mind as you read:
- You’re really not going crazy!
- Many others have had to travel this hard road before you. You are not alone.
- Grief is a long-term process, and you will have good days and bad.
- There is hope – brighter days lie ahead for you.
- You will never return to your pre-grief state, but you will eventually find joy in life in new ways that you invent.
- There really are no true “stages of grief” and no time frame for mourning.
All that being said, these are the 4 major working theories about the stages or tasks of grieving:
Helpful resources as you go through the stages of grief
~Are you devastated by the loss of a loved one?
~Bewildered by all the strong emotions and crazy symptoms?
~Wondering how you are ever going to survive?
~Tired of being stuck in complicated grief?
Back To Life! Our Personal Grief Guidebook might be just the help you are looking for. Read more about this most useful and practical recovery guide here:
Back To Life!
In addition to the written guidebook, we also offer a unique audio program to help with grief coping and relaxation. If you think an audio approach might be helpful, consider this program: